One of my favorite stories concerns a Buddhist scholar and a Zen Master. The scholar had an extensive background in Buddhist Studies and was an expert on the Nirvana Sutra. He came to study with the master and after making the customary bows, asked her to teach him Zen. Then, he began to talk about his extensive doctrinal background and rambled on and on about the many sutras he had studied.
The master listened patiently and then began to make tea. When it was ready, she poured the tea into the scholar's cup until it began to overflow and run all over the floor. The scholar saw what was happening and shouted, "Stop, stop! The cup is full; you can't get anymore in."
The master stopped pouring and said: "You are like this cup; you are full of ideas about Buddha's Way. You come and ask for teaching, but your cup is full; I can't put anything in. Before I can teach you, you'll have to empty your cup."
This story is and old one, but it continues to be played out in our lives day-by-day. We are so enamored of our own ideas and opinions and so trapped by our conditioning that we fill ourselves up to the brim and nothing can get in.
I tend to quote this Zen story very often. Not many of us (and that includes me) are geared to take constructive criticisms very well (though we also claim we don't get much feedback so that we can improve). When we do get some, the emotion varies from denial or blaming someone else or getting very defensive. Acknowledging that there we could/can do better is almost often the first step to learn and grow. Remember the Zen master's wisdom "to learn something, you should first have an empty cup" - next time when you catch yourself not being open to feedback.
(Source: Nebraska Zen Center)
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