Empty your cup if you want to grow

One of my favorite stories concerns a Buddhist scholar and a Zen Master. The scholar had an extensive background in Buddhist Studies and was an expert on the Nirvana Sutra. He came to study with the master and after making the customary bows, asked her to teach him Zen. Then, he began to talk about his extensive doctrinal background and rambled on and on about the many sutras he had studied.

The master listened patiently and then began to make tea. When it was ready, she poured the tea into the scholar's cup until it began to overflow and run all over the floor. The scholar saw what was happening and shouted, "Stop, stop! The cup is full; you can't get anymore in."

The master stopped pouring and said: "You are like this cup; you are full of ideas about Buddha's Way. You come and ask for teaching, but your cup is full; I can't put anything in. Before I can teach you, you'll have to empty your cup."

This story is and old one, but it continues to be played out in our lives day-by-day. We are so enamored of our own ideas and opinions and so trapped by our conditioning that we fill ourselves up to the brim and nothing can get in.

I tend to quote this Zen story very often. Not many of us (and that includes me) are geared to take constructive criticisms very well (though we also claim we don't get much feedback so that we can improve). When we do get some, the emotion varies from denial or blaming someone else or getting very defensive. Acknowledging that there we could/can do better is almost often the first step to learn and grow. Remember the Zen master's wisdom "to learn something, you should first have an empty cup" - next time when you catch yourself not being open to feedback.

(Source: Nebraska Zen Center)

Why Nice Bosses Finish First

I chanced upon this article titled Why Nice Bosses Finish First,  by Dr. Travis Bradberry, co-author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0. He talks about the fact that the era of "tough" boss is over and its now the era of nice bosses. In this article he discusses what exactly does a "nice" boss look like and how does one pull this off without being a pushover. I've copied the highlights here:

• They’re kind without being weak
• They're strong without being harsh
• They’re confident, without being cocky
• They stay positive, but remain realistic
• They’re role models, not preachers
• They’re willing to take a bullet for their people
• They balance work and fun
• They form personal connections
• They deliver feedback flawlessly
• They’re generous.

Have you worked for a nice boss? Please share some traits you observed.

Dr.T-isms

I'm an unabashed fan of Dr. T (who isn't). You have to work very hard NOT to get inspired when he is around you. In 2014-15 I was fortunate to be a part of our prestigious LDS training program that Dr. T himself personally leads.  (it happens only once every two years and very difficult to get I'm. Only Gowrisha and I have had the privilege of attending it so far from NIB R&D). On the last day of the training, on popular demand, Dr. T shared some of his beliefs that is popularly known as Dr. T-isms. Here are they. Things in braces are my notes from the session.

• Ooch your way (start small and build on it, as opposed to starting with something grandiose and not getting enough support)
• Iron Will (Dr. T believes we at NI make the "impossible possible; and possible, easy". Having an unshakeable will, surely is a necessary component to do this, especially when the going gets tough)
• Be the biggest optimist and pessimist (when planning be as pessimistic as possible,  but execute with optimism)
• Genius of the AND (do not look for either/or solutions, clubbing the best of both can give you great solutions)
• Option Play (have a Plan A, B and C for everything, so that you can switch quickly should some assumptions go wrong)
• Start from where you are (do not make incorrect assumptions)
• Good, Better, Best (be aware of how we can segment the market to cater to the demands of various cutomers)
• "Talent does what it can; Genius does what it must"
• "The nicer you are, the tougher you can be"
• "Everyone is right if you look from their perspective"

We find our way by getting lost

One of my favourite thought leaders Seth Godin said this "We find our way by getting lost. Anything other than that is called reading a map". As an itinerant I could relate to this immediately, as I've got lost in several places and as a result I discovered some wonderful things (apart from finding out a way back to home). However, it also stuck to me that it could be true in professional lives too. When I looked back on my career, some of the most fulfilling assignments came because I took the risk of getting lost and trusted myself to find a way. Perhaps this is what Richard Bronson also is telling when he says "If somebody offers you an amazing opportunity but you are not sure you can do it, say yes – then learn how to do it later!". 

I see many of us are more comfortable in the known. When an opportunity presents. we get frozen by FUD (Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt). Rightfully so. Why would you want to rock the boat? But then someone said "

Mastery: Ignore the cynics, dismiss the critics

These days I'm contemplating on one word "Mastery", trying to understand what it is and how we can attain mastery in all walks of life. But I ended up spending more time thinking about the opposite of Mastery - Mediocrity. It is easy to fall into Mediocrity. This is so invisible. Remember the broken window syndrome? (Thanks to my boss Joel Sumner for drilling into me to be always vigilant against broken window). 

Mediocrity is also about giving less than 100%, being satisfied with average, happily giving excuses on why something cannot be done, being a wandering generality, never committed to anything but speaking in present continuos terms like "working on", "going on", "looking into" etc., I'm sure you'd have more to add.

You start accepting average (product, behavior, conversations, etc.,). It quickly becomes a way of life. Be a fanatic against broken window. You will leave the crowd and therefore you will leave the cult of mediocrity. People say “whats wrong with you”. 

Here are some quotes to keep you on the path to Mastery and leave the crowd

• Don’t loose your way to the top – Jack Welch
• There will never be a better you than you – Warren Buffet
• Be yourself, everyone else is taken – Oscar Wilde
• For some to love you, some must loathe you – J C Rowling
• If people don’t hate you, you are not doing big things – Jay Z

HBR Pick: How to apply right amount of stress

If you are a manager or a tech lead for some time, you'd have surely faced this dilemma of wondering whether the stress you are putting on your team/team-member is adequate or not. If it is too little, you may not get the required results. If it crosses the line, the whole thing might break down (and the line belongs to the team/team-member). I chanced upon an HBR article "How to put the right amount of pressure on your team". Read it. It has some interesting ideas.