Menteeing: How I've chosen my mentors

Knowing that I always would be menteeing under someone, recently a colleague asked me how I go about choosing a mentor for myself. I have never followed a process, but based on my mentee journey so far, I seem to seek mentor for three specific needs:

1. I get a chance to work with an expert and also feel that I can/need learn something from them on their area of expertise. Some examples:

• Even after joining NI, my heart was still in start-ups and I still was nursing the dream of being an advisor to start-up. I figured I was not knowledgeable on the VC/funding part, which I found very intriguing. So, I signed up the CFO of my previous company to be a mentor. I used to have skype calls with him 4-6 times an year and usually used to go with specific questions.  
• Other one was with an expert on Innovation. This is tricky as he has been my friend/peer for a long time. But I specifically wanted it to be called that way, as I got interested in how to go about Innovation. We used to meet 6-8 times in an year and I used to ask a lot of questions and his answers made me think and I was able to implement a few of those.

Both of the above lasted for 1.5 to 2 years and I came out of it being knowledgable about the theoretical aspects of these two subjects.

2. I identify a development need (usually has come from my boss either as a weakness that needs to be fixed or a new skill to be developed for future growth) and then find out who in my circle (or usually in the circle of other mentors) can mentor me. Some examples: 

• My upcoming plan to approach a very senior person specifically on being a project sponsor from a remote site
• Few years ago, I had signed a well known Leadership/Org Development consultant in Bangalore to help me lead technical people after I moved over as a manager to Wireless domain from the EDA domain

Note that #1 above is more of an interest, whereas this one is an identified development need.

3. Finding feet in a new org and to build relationships within the org. This is most important when you join a new org. Even otherwise it is always good to have someone as a mentor outside your own BU especially for folks in remote sites. 

• Almost as soon as I joined NI, I signed up with a senior person at the HQ and it continues till day. During my initial days, this mentor introduced me to lot of people, helped me understand how decisions are made at NI, key philosophies, key decision makers etc., Over the last few years, he is mainly acting as a sounding board (encouraging me to grow and calling out stupid ideas without mincing words). He also lends his shoulders to lean on, offers invaluable guidance on org development and has been one of my big supporters along with my boss.

I owe all my success and growth to a host of my mentors (and bosses that I'm lucky enough to be coached by). When the likes of Steve Jobs and Roger Federer have mentors, why not me and you have a mentor?

Some things that I'd made sure include:

1. You want to be willing to do it voluntarily. Have a belief that there’d always be some blindspots or areas of improvement and be humble enough to acknowledge that we can always learn from others.  Many times I've not liked what I've heard or the things that mentors make me do, has taken me out of my comfort zone, but this precisely is the reason to work with mentors.
2. I always set-up the meeting based on mentor’s availability and what works for him 
3. I diligently work on things they suggest (do something or read something) and keep them posted (fair amount of email conversation between meetings)
4. I show up for meetings and own-up something that I’ve not done (don’t give excuses)
5. Sometimes mentors do ask for favours (usually for others, rarely for themselves) and since I’m taking their useful time, I’ll act on them.

Please note mentors do not get anything in return for their time and efforts. However they do get a lot of joy in seeing their mentees grow and succeed. I'm therefore very careful with their time.

In summary, I've sought mentors for the following:

• For a reassuring pat on the back
• For an unapologetic slap on the face
• To explain why my fears are unfounded
• To tell me why my excuses are BS

(and for everything else you've a friend/partner/spouse that tells you exactly what you want to hear, make you happy in the short run and therefore possibly irrelevant in the long run).

Now go find a mentor.